In honor of all the responses to cheese's post that indicate a startling number of our friends have "leaky valves," David has offered to hold a leaky valve clinic at our apartment tomorrow from 9:00-5:00, during which he will utilize 1st semester medical school knowledge and a little bit of magic (he memorized some spells from harry potter-- major nerd) to stop up the leaks. he regrets to point out that anesthesia isn't until 3rd year electives, though, and kindly requests that all patients bring their own bullets to bite down on during the procedure.
and i will make your favorite starbucks drink while you wait-- decaf, of course, to prevent your hearts from beating too fast. no bullet necessary, because i'm capable of practicing the full scope of starbucks techniques without inducing pain (dave clearly has some catching up to do).
and, for lack of a heart ailment to post about, i have an 10-centimeter cyst on my left kidney. i'm really hoping a lot of you do as well-- david needs the practice (don't freak out, i've known about it for years, and david figured out how to use our HDTV for catscans to monitor my progress-- i clearly have some catching up to do).
and now... for the greatest feat of the entire post thus far-- the end of my procrastination, and the re-beginning of my studying.
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5 comments:
Did we know about this cyst?
hahahaha - i'm sitting here alone in my apartment chuckling aloud to my computer screen. good job, brian, i needed that. there's nothing funnier to me than a kidney cyst...haha
perfect... i sat at my computer, wondered quietly to myself, "how is that ol' sharon bastard doin'?" and, lo and behold, there was a post on the blog! It was as if the heavens had opened!
like jennifer, i'm sitting here chucking aloud (a noteworthy occurance for me) but unlike jennifer i am not alone but at one of the many computers in clemson's cooper library. sort of disruptive, i know. all that to say. haha, that was funny, and i could tell you that i have a cyst on my kidney, but that would be a lie and my fiance hasnt rubbed off on me that much yet.
that's unfortunate, because though I'm sure "episky" will cure up small leaks... I'm not so sure about cysts. :)
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