Ethiopian Happenings...

Hey family! A short anecdote about on the happenings in my life: this past week I was invited to teach a 9^th grade civics class their unit on HIV/AIDS. Sounded like a good idea. Turns out that it was more like a co-ed 9^th grade health class, which is awkward enough when you’re a student. Much worse as the teacher. Anyway, the teacher and I get through the lesson, which is fine, and then I open it up for questions. Most questions are fairly typical: can I get HIV from sweat, what if someone bleeds all over my food and then I eat it (why the heck you would continue eating…?), etc. Then one kid stands up and claims that a nurse once told him that, because he is young and strong (no way he clears 5 feet and weighs maybe 70lbs), his bodily fluids can fight off the HIV virus. He would like to know if this is true. I was tempted to tell him, “yes, in fact. There are little men inside of you with laser guns, poised and ready to fight at a moments notice. If only everyone knew this, HIV wouldn’t be the problem it is today.”

Really the point of this post is to make a request… I’ve been working for awhile on setting up a resource center for students in Finote Selam. We finally got computers donated, set up, and I’m starting to give the teachers training this week. We’re hoping by the next school year that the students will be able to get training too. Now I’m looking for books. Since many of you are at educational institutions, I was wondering if you could keep an eye out? You know how sometimes schools get rid of old books when they update their curriculum? Maybe if that was happening at your school and the old books didn’t have anywhere to go? Or if there were just piles of books laying around with no one using them… we aren’t picky. Any grade, any subject. All their classes are taught in English, which is convenient. If not, no big deal… just thought I’d ask!

Posts lately have been great- you guys are hilarious. Miss you all! Love!

Shmeat

It has come to attention as of late that some members of our illustrious group of sojourners, have decided to participate in a great heresy known as vegetarianism. although we have all been tempted by the large veggie monster at one time or another (i for one once firmly devoted myself to vegetarianism between lunch and dinner) Thankfully Stephen Colbert has the perfect solution to this problem...

http://www.hulu.com/watch/63233/the-colbert-report-world-of-nahlej---shmeat

Hey guys . . .

THIS is what I want to do for my birthday.

BLT! BLT!

BMT! BMT!

Hi friends! Just a quick post about my life. I'm in this internship thing at UAB which has been pretty freakin' awesome actually. It comes to and end in May so I thought I should get on the ball and start interviewing at a few places to secure a job in this crazy 'conomy. Sooo, I interviewed last week on the Bone Marrow Transplant Unit (this means I will mostly have patients with leukemias and lymphomas...i.e. cancer) and found out today that I got the job! Wahoo! I start WAY sooner than I thought....ehem, Monday?!? Anyhow, thanks to those of you here in the Ham who knew about my prospects and encouraged me to go to the job fair when I really didn't need to because I was already a UAB employee. Thanks for the encouragement and prayers. I'm pumped! It's a wonderful feeling to love your job!

Also, I think one day I will write a short story about the different types of blood cells with each one of our friends representing a different type of cell based on personality and daily function. This story will be heavily influenced by Rudyard Kipling's writing style (Jungle Book, people) and complete with illustrations. Just and idea that I have been throwing around in my head that edges closer to reality when I'm around Brian Sharon...he brings out my inner nerd. That's all.

Love!

Hipster Handbook: Glossary

Just in case there was any confusion about whether ANY of us could be classified as "hipsters," here's an excerpt of the glossary of hipsterese (a language which neither you, nor  I, speak) found on NPR.

bronson - beer
sentence: "I drank a sixer of bronsons last night while watching the game."
Origin: Watching Charles Bronson movies while drinking beer is deck. The term spawned from this ritual.

bust a moby - to dance
sentence: "Let's go to the Tunnel and bust a moby."
"Did you see her moves at the party last night? She really knows how to bust a moby."

chipper - a woman who's easy
sentence: "She's a real chipper and will sleep with anyone after one bronson."

clothesline - the gossip that is on the scene
sentence: "Yo, I heard on the clothesline that she is sleeping with Billy. She is such a chipper."

cronkite - boy
sentence: "Have you seen Anne's new cronkite? She met him at the cafe and he is such a frado."

deck - a key word for most Hipsters, similar in meaning to the antiquated fresh. To be deck is to be up on the latest trends, cutting edge, and/or hip.
sentence: "That tassel we met at the gallery opening sure looked deck in her cowboy boots."
" Have you checked out the new Jonathan Lethem book? It's deck."


fin - the opposite of deck, similar to outdated terms like "wack" and "lame." Something that is fin is bad or undesirable.
sentence: "How can you like that Vin Diesel movie? Every film he's ever starred in has been fin."
"My date with Larry was so fin. He took me to Applebee's and ordered cheese fries as an appetizer."

frado - an ugly guy who thinks he's good-looking
sentence: "Bill thinks all the girls love him, but they all know he's a frado."

the frigidaire - the cold shoulder
sentence: "I don't know what her problem is, but she gives me the frigidaire every time I see her."
jerry - a stoner or hippie
sentence: My pits smell ishtar. I feel like a total jerry.

juicer - a ladies' man. An individual who has undeniable sex appeal.
sentence: "I wish he would ask me out, he's such a juicer."

jug - a 40 ounce bottle of domestic beer.
sentence: "Tassels respect me. I can drink a whole jug and still bust a mean moby."

kale - money
sentence: "Yo Kim, can you slide me some kale? I'm still waiting for my mom to send rent."

kidsman - one who rounds up children to educate them in thievery. (Oops-this is Victorian slang, not Hipster slang)

midtown - uncultured or unhip
sentence: "He's never heard of Spike Jonze. He's so midtown."

piece - cell phone
sentence: "John is such a nerd. He doesn't even have a piece."
"I must have been on the subway, my piece didn't ring."

shitter - someone who constantly looks like he/she is taking a shit.
sentence: "Dude, Jake is such a shitter."

tassel - girl
sentence: "Jim is definitely a frado, but somehow he gets a new tassel every night."

I like the idea of it more than I actually like it.

Hey guys I know that I am always posting on these blogs and whining about what's going on in my life but here I go again. I have been struggling lately, because i feel like I am being called to really commit to this neighborhood, and have been given the oppurtunity to buy a house here that would be great for me, and a perfect beginner house. However, i am going to be jobless and need to get a job before I can pay for the house. i have interviewed for a job but its looking iffy and its just a hard job market to be out looking for a job in. I feel like God is teaching me to be patient, and that he has a plan i just need to be faithful and trust in him, but its just hard and frustrating at times. So anyways just wanted to catch ya'll up on my life. I love all of you guys and misses ya'll i am blessed to know you and count you as my friends. Points if you know what movie the title of my post comes from.

Little Bundles of Joy Aren't the Only Things Storks Deliver

Dear friends,

Take a close look at this photo. This guy (or one of his friends; it's hard to be sure) pooped on me today. On my head ... all over me, actually. It was very public. I had no tissues.

It's hard to describe the sensation, but I would say it was reminiscent of the slimings on the Nickelodeon hit show You Can't Do That on Television. Except the Nickelodeon slime was supposedly edible and delicious, and I seriously doubt that my warm, white and sticky brand of slime was anything but.

Words of sympathy, condolence and gifts of intense clarifying shampoo would be appreciated.

Manglish Answers

1. Have you ever seen someone's bonnet (hood) fly up while they were driving down the road?

2. My boots (cleats) are in the boot (trunk). (double whammy)

3. Nobody wants to be the lamppost (third wheel...this one might be my favorite phrase).

4. Does anybody have a plaster? (band-aid...have I told you about the time my housemate and I got into a fight about this one? She cut her finger and wanted a plaster; I had no clue what a plaster was but offered a band-aid. She insisted she didn't want a band-aid until she saw it and exclaimed, "That's a plaster!" Oh what fun it is to live with a national!)

5. Can I follow (ride in your car) you to church? This one can initially be confusing as you wait in your car for someone to pull up behind you; at the same time they're waiting on you to pick them up somewhere...

6. I'm gonna make a move (leave) first. I like your definition better, Ryan! I'm not sure why they say this, but they feel the urge to announce when they're leaving by "making a move".

7. I had to use my torchlight (flashlight) today. I had to control my laughter the first time I heard my housemate say that one. Then again, I'm sure she laughs at me: I wear my headlamp every chance I get!)

8. Ugh, my computer hanged (froze) again!
9. I need to go to the toilet. (a freebie) They never say bathroom or restroom here. It's always toilet. It took me a while to get used to saying toilet. It just sounds impolite to me. One day at a Frisbee match I wanted to use the public toilet, which usually costs money at parks and fields. The sign said 0.20 cents-toilet, 0.50 cents-bathroom. When I asked the lady what the difference was she looked at me like I was an idiot. Toilet is obvious; bathroom is literally where you take a bath...except there are no baths here. I guess it should really say showerroom.

10. My computer's spoiled already. (already broken- I don't know if I can adequately describe the way they use already. Maybe they just over use it already until the word appears in almost every other sentence.)

11. I banged (hit) the car! (I think this is my housemate's favorite word!)

Good job, David! You got most of them right! I'm trying to think if there are any other exciting things to report from over here. Oh, I found 2 different cockroaches on me yesterday within an hour of each other! One was in my hair and quickly scurried away. A little while later I felt something in my shirt and after a quick jump, shook my shirt. When nothing scurried out I thought I was just being paranoid. And then 4 seconds later I felt it again. I shook the shirt again. Nothing. I'm in a shopping mall. I frantically RUN to the bathroom, slam the stall door closed, throw my shirt off and give it one hard shake. The little clinger scurries to a corner of the stall. I officially don't like cockroaches.

That's all for now! Hope you're all well! If you don't get my monthly updates but want to (or if you've changed your email since I started sending updates) please let me know! Love and miss you all!